Dales Drifter Hiking Patch – Full Kit Wanker Badge for Hill Goblins & Wanderers
Outfitted like you’re conquering Everest but actually en route to the corner shop? You might be entitled to compensation—or at least this patch.
This 3-inch iron-on badge immortalizes the glorious absurdity of hill goblins, dale wanderers, and fully-kitted legends who are always prepared… for absolutely nothing.
Whether you’re:
✅ Flexing £600 worth of Gore-Tex to buy a meal deal
✅ Navigating sheep fields like they’re alpine ridgelines
✅ Or just out here vibing in your best gear with zero destination.
This patch says: I hike hard. I snack harder. I regret nothing.
📍Slap it on your rucksack, parka, or smug self-awareness and let the world know you're embracing your inner Full Kit Wanker with pride.
:
✅ Material: 100% polyester
✅ Size: 3 inches (7.6 cm) in diameter
✅ Design: One-sided print featuring a dazed-yet-determined dale drifter
✅ Edges: Black with black stitching for walk-of-shame resilience
✅ Origin: Assembled in the USA from globally sourced parts
Join the most overprepared, under-focused hiking club in existence.
now and become an icon of unnecessary readiness.